Now, usually I would fill a blog with this title with the combinations of letters that make the words that represent the things back home that I'm yearning to see, do, or be with. But, right now. That's not on the top of my head. Actually, nothing is really on the top of my head.
I seem to be in a downswing in some ways. No matter the event, or the people there, I can't bring myself to be happy about it.
I ate some food, watched some Stewart and Colbert and sat down to an unfinished blog and realized how drastically my mood had changed. Some further realization made me realize that I'd done this all to myself in the name of "my future". Whatever the fuck that means. Though, if there's one thing that I've learned is that the things you want and miss, aren't always the things that you really want. You simply want to want them so bad that it nearly becomes reality.
Up until recently I believed that I only had one love in my life. Dancing. I haven't been dancing lately. I'm depressed. The best dancing comes from the disturbed mind. Perhaps I'll pick up the beat again. Until another time. B.
2 comments:
Will has been just the same for a while... not dancing as much as he should.
Fuck I miss home. I'm coming back for a whole month, probably in May. It's going to be expensive as fuck but I have to find a way back there.
I know exactly what you mean about "your future" and what you do "for it". Just remember that you aren't waiting for life to happen, it's happening right now... and if you aren't happy, then you aren't doing what's right for you right now.
Prince George has psych courses and philosophy courses. Granted, they suck, and Prince George is notoriously good at letting people fall into bad habits, but... if your unhappy now...
I didn't know what I really wanted until now. I guess that thing was direction in my life. I now have it. There will be people I miss when I go, but I think knowing what I want and working towards it will keep me sane. Maybe you're the same way.
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